2014: Focus

Last year, I wanted to pick one little word like I have done in the past, but nothing really stuck out. And to be honest, it was all I could do to just take one day at a time. I was in the beginning stages of pregnancy, and so very tired.

In my life right now, I feel pretty scattered. I want to do so many things; I have many lists, and each is a mile long. So, I thought about what one little word would help me to accomplish what I want, but without being too overwhelming (because I tend to over-complicate things), and the word Focus came to mind. The word Focus has a general feeling of checking boxes and getting things done, but it also has a very deliberate feeling as well. Someone focused, knows how they want to be spending their time, has picked the tasks they are checking off, stays on task while they finish each item. 

I need to Focus:

- on my kids. I want to spend one-on-one time with each one everyday.

- on documenting my life. I haven't made time to scrapbook, journal or blog in a very long time, and not only do I miss it, but I feel it is something important that I should be doing.

- on staying organized and clean. Our family deserves to live in an organized and clean environment, and when I stay focused on keeping up with it a little each day, our clutter stays manageable. It is when I get lazy or scattered that it gets out of hand.

- our finances. I plan to listen to Financial Peace University (on CD) by Dave Ramsey again and rekindle the fire to get out of debt once and for all. I want to focus on our budget so our money goes exactly where we tell it to go.

- on filling my spiritual tank. That includes morning and evening prayers, scripture study, and family home evening. I notice (over and over) when I am doing the little things to have the Spirit with me, it really does set the tone in our home. Also, as the Personal Progress Coordinator in my ward, I want to focus on completing the program not only to fill my spiritual tank, but to inspire and encourage the girls in my ward as well. 

- on learning how to improve my photography a little more. I'm going to try to post more often on Instagram, and I'm starting up an old project: five people twelve times, to help me learn more about the settings on my camera, and to get me out from behind the lens a little bit more. 

What about you? Do you pick a word for the year? 

One Word: 2012

Man, I really slacked off reporting about my one little word of 2011: REFINE. I learned a ton though - about myself, and about what kind of person I want to become. I feel like it made me softer, a little more patient, and definitely more self-controlled in the finance department. I'm sad to let that word go.

It took me a while to figure out my word for this year. Although, if I had been paying attention it would have come to me much sooner.  Let me explain.

Our family has gone through a lot of changes in the last few months. I stopped tending my nieces and resumed doing massage again, we went from 3 to 4 when Avery was born, and Justin got called to be the Stake Sports Specialist (say that three times fast!) in our church. Harvey is in the final stages of adjusting to the role of big brother, and just started potty training! On top of all of that, Justin got a new job (or should I say career) which requires him to do some traveling for the first 6 months. While all of this is exciting... adjusting to it all is going to be hard.

Every time I thought about it all, I wanted my word to be ENDURE. Just the thought everything kind of stressed me out and I felt like choosing to "endure" it would be easy. But somehow "easy" felt like I was coping out. I knew my word should help me grow - become something better, even though it would be hard.

And I can do hard things. So this year my little word is

(modified via here)

This word has always been a favorite of mine. I wanted to choose it last year, but I'm glad I saved it.

I think it's the perfect word to follow REFINE. When a piece of metal is refined - once all of the impurities are removed - of course you would set to work to make it beautiful. You would make it SHINE.

The LDS church chooses a theme each year for the youth (and I'm included in that because I'm serving in the Young Women program). This year it is the scripture: “Arise and SHINE forth, that thy light may be a standard for the nations” (Doctrine and Covenants 115:5). I love this.

In college I first heard the song "Shine" by the Newsboys. It talks about gaining a testimony, being a good example to others, thus creating a desire within them to change for the better. The chorus says:

Shine
Make 'em wonder what you've got
Make 'em wish that they were not
On the outside looking bored
Shine
Let it shine before all men
Let 'em see good works, and then
Let 'em glorify the Lord

I love the words, and I love the beat.

This year I want to SHINE - reflecting the light of the Son (as in, the Son of God - Jesus Christ). The closer my relationship with Him, the brighter I'll be. I want my attitude, my appearance, and my soul to SHINE. I want others to feel my light; to be uplifted when they are around me. I know this sounds like I'm just piling on more things to add to my "to-do" list, but I feel that if I start focusing on others, on being positive, on filling my spiritual tank with His light, I'll have more capability to do the other things on my list.

I'll be able to "rise and SHINE" (or get up and do!). And with all our family is going through, I need to be capable.

What about you?? Do you pick one little word each year? What are your goals & resolutions?

Refine, V.3

Whew! I can't believe how fast this year is moving;... it's halfway over! As I told you last month, I decided to focus on refining the "system" I had for our finances. Well, if you could call it a system. Anyway, I'm happy to say I have set up a Cash Flow Plan (because "budget" just sounds evil), a debt snowball, and we are well on our way to becoming completely debt free in just a couple of years (well, except for the house). I have to say it will be a sweet day when I never have to see another cent go out of our bank account for a student loan.

I'm not sure why I haven't done this before. Dave's Plan is really straightforward, and fairly simple to put into place. But then again, I have been given some major motivation because those cute girls I used to babysit on a regular basis are now much older, and my hours have been drastically cut. (By the way, if any of you are in need of a massage my hours are pretty open...)

Regardless, this whole process of refining our finances has been really good for me. I've also stumbled on quite a bit of information that makes me REALLY want to be debt free. Like even having our home paid off. The direction our economy is headed just makes me a little nervous. Whether our country is headed for an economic depression or whether we are headed toward more fruitful times, I will feel much more secure with my family knowing that we are prepared for it all. Which brings me to July...

This month I have decided to finish up a project I started earlier this year: Emergency Preparedness. I spent lots of time on our 72 hour kits in March, but I want to completely refine our Emergency Plan. I want to make sure that not only will my family have things they need... but know what they need to do, and where to go during an emergency. Fun stuff!

Refine, V.2

I haven't posted lately (umm.. since the end of JANUARY!) how I've been doing with my one little word for the year. But I have been keeping up with it. Here's a little recap:

March:
I was in the exhaustion phase of being pregnant. It was seriously all I could do to keep up with Harvey and the basic things going on in my life. I decided to refine the focus on myself. Gosh, that sounds selfish. But it was good for me. I know, at least with myself, it is so hard to say "No." Especially when it's something good, but just not the right time, or I just didn't have the energy to pull it off.

But since I was refining my focus, I allowed myself to say - without guilt - that I needed a nap more than those dishes needed to be cleaned. That it was perfectly okay for me to tell a neighbor that I just wouldn't be able to do a favor that they had asked me. That I needed to accept my mother's offer to clean around my house a bit. I learned that sometimes, it's essential and healthy to put your needs above others.

April:
Sometime around the end of March, I stumbled upon a blog that has seriously inspired me. Shannon from The Red Headed Hostess, is a Seminary Teacher (teaching religion to high school students), and has spoken for the (awesome) LDS program Especially For Youth, among many other things. Please - check out her blog.

My favorite idea on her blog are her Scripture Journals. From a young age, I have kept "church notebooks" - notes and handouts from youth classes, notes from speeches at EFY, inspiration I've received at church, and all of my notes from classes while attending BYU-Nauvoo. Now that I'm a church teacher for the young women ages 14-17 in my church... I've learned the value of having written all of that down. But there was a major problem with my system. Every time I remembered some specific tidbit of info, I have to hunt it down. Literally sift through a pile of notebooks until I found what I was looking for.

Sharron solved my problem with her system. I took the month of April to refine all of my notes, handouts and inspiration. I made myself a new scripture journal, set up her system inside, and transferred a TON of info from some of my notebooks. In fact, I have already merged all of my youth notebooks into my new journal. I'm still working on all of my Nauvoo stuff, but it will take a while. And the best part? I actually look forward to studying the scriptures, and relearning all of the amazing doctrine I wrote down!

May:
Last month, we were in the final stages of finishing our basement. And for the last 2 and a half years, our basement has been the catch-all for junk. Yikes! I decided to refine our home, and get rid of anything and everything we didn't absolutely cherish or weren't currently using. *Phew!* It took a LOT of patience, work, and WILLPOWER to go through it all. And I was brutal. My mom's neighborhood is having a yard sale (she lives in a gated community) and I'm participating this Saturday. Anything that doesn't sell, is going straight to Goodwill. I am seriously LOVING the space. It just feels lighter.

As I told my mom: "If I haven't used it in 5 years, then why keep it? When I buy something that I really will use... but have no room for it, I just have to go through and reorganize all of the junk that I'm not using to make room. I spend too much time sorting and moving all the junk - or worse - searching through the junk for the stuff I love and need. I'm over it."

June:
Okay. I'm going to admit something embarrassing: I'm not great with money. In the past I've blamed it on all sorts of things, but I'm done with that. What I do with my (our) money is completely my (our) responsibility. No more blaming. Just change. I have been blessed with the knowledge of Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover for 5 years now, and it's about time I put it into practice. I'll let you know how refining my money habits goes..

Refine, V.1

For the month of January I decided to "refine" my cleaning/organization routine. Which I did - and shared with you. So far, it's been working great. My laundry has been washed and folded, my dishwasher got cleaned out, and I've even been making my bed each morning.

While the routine part has been going well, I had also kinda, sorta planned to get down and dirty with the clutter spots in my home. That hasn't happened. Boo. Probably because I only kinda, sorta planned it in the back of my head instead of making it a top priority goal. But other things have been going on around here. (More on that later.)

My original plan for my one little word, was to pick out a temporal and a spiritual theme for each month to focus on, but the spiritual one for January never quite did get figured out either.

February will be different. For the month of love... I've decided to focus on refining my relationships.

... with Justin: 
- sincerely compliment him at least once per day (honestly, this should be easy.. I think lots of great things about him already, I just need to vocalize them so he knows about them!)

-  do the 12 Days of Valentines for him.

- make sure I kiss him - before anything else - when he or I comes home each day.

- try really hard to make this a month of little or no contention. Not that I want to have a perfect utopia, but I think if I concentrate on accentuating the positive.. or building him up, I'll let the little things slide off my back instead of creating needless tension. It's just a little experiment.

... with Harvey:
- get down on the floor and play with him - and his choice of toys - for at least one hour every day. I mean, we do things together a lot, but it's usually what I want. It's sad, but one hour sounds like a long time for me. But I love that little guy, and I want him to know I do. I know I tell him, but I need to show him too.

- say "yes" more. I feel like I'm constantly telling him no. No, you can't touch that. No, we can't go there. No, that's not nice. My goal is to say yes - even if in between the lines I mean no. Yes, you can play with another toy. Yes, we can go there (even if that means - heaven forbid - I have to put on a jacket and play outside with him for a while). Yes! Let's distract you from whatever it is I don't want you to do...

- do the 12 Days of Valentines for him, too.

... with Jesus Christ:
- pray every morning and every night.

- finish reading my "How well do you know Jesus Christ?" scripture chain.

Whew! How are you doing with your goals? What are you going to do this month?

One Little Word: 2011

Last year I stumbled upon the idea of selecting one word for the year.

And that little word changed my perspective. My word for 2010 was Thankful, and just thinking about it in the back of my mind changed how I looked at the good, and the bad. I realized just how blessed I am... and that usually I have absolutely nothing to complain about.

This year, my word kind of chose me. While reading scriptures one night it almost jumped off the page. And then when I mentioned it in one of my Young Women lessons, my wonderfully spiritual President gave me the following story, and I knew what my word for 2011 was:

Malachi 3:3 says "He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver..."

This verse puzzled some women in a Bible study and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God. One of the women offered to find out the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible Study.

That week, the woman called a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity about the process of refining silver.

As she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all of the impurities.

The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot; then she thought again about the verse that says: "He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver." She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the silver was being refined.

The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.

The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, "How do you know when the silver is fully refined?"

"He smiled and answered, "Oh, that's easy - when I see my image in it."

So.. this year I'm going to work on refining me: inside and out. The dictionary says that to be refined is to be pure, elegant, free of impurities, and course or unsuitable characteristics. Man. I've got a long way to go. Here's to a year full of improvement!

Will you join me? What word will you choose?