Friday, August 19, 2011

On Being Present

Today was one of those days.

A day where I had to force my exhausted body out of bed. I fed my son a half healthy breakfast of zucchini bread and applesauce. And then I turned on the television. I'm pretty sure it stayed on until lunch time. Harvey amazingly enough entertained himself watching "his shows" and playing with random toys in the living room, while I piddled around doing things on the list or just plain wasted time. Before I knew it, lunch time had passed and we hadn't even gotten ready for the day.

Harvey finally came in to me, grabbed my hand and asked to go outside. I really didn't want to. But I made myself go sit on our patio swing while he found more ways to entertain himself outside in our backyard. After a while he found a worm and begged me to come see. He literally had to pull on my arm and beg.  I finally got my lazy self off that swing to inspect the little creature.

Anyway, now it's naptime. And while I so desperately want to take a nap and waste more of the day away... I somehow got on the computer and stumbled on this post from 71toes. (If you don't already read her blog, you should add it to your list. It is completely inspiring.)

The quote at the bottom of her post is what really got me:
“Everything in all the books I once pored over is finished for me now. Penelope Leach. T. Berry Brazelton. Dr. Spock. The ones on sibling rivalry and sleeping through the night and early-childhood education, all grown obsolete. Along with ‘Goodnight Moon’ and ‘Where the Wild Things Are,’ they are battered, spotted, well used. But I suspect that if you flipped the pages dust would rise like memories.” Then she goes on and talks about some of the mistakes she made while raising her babies. “…the biggest mistake I made is the one that most of us make…I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of the three of [my children] sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages 6, 4, and 1. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less.

--Anna Quindlen

And now I want to resolve to be more in the moment. More aware of the look of curiosity and glee on Harvey's face while he cheers for the digging worms just like Curious George in the Worm Race episode. More aware of his facination with all things automotive by actually getting on the floor to play with his trains or cars. More aware of his desire to be with me... and including him while I cook dinner, or paint one of my craft projects, or even mop the floor.

I can't believe he has already gone from this...

to this...

in one blink. I feel like I've missed and forgotten so much of it already, and I'm determined not to miss any more.


  1. I totally understand, Tiff. They get big way too fast.

  2. When I began reading this post I thought to myself "hallelujah, i'm not the only one". Because honestly I had a day just like this one yesterday. Part of me felt a little guilty as Kaleb begged me to play hungry hippos and as i hit "play" on the dvd player for the 5th time. *SIGH*

    Don't be too hard on yourself. The last month of pregnancy is a killer when you have another kid to chase I have decided.

    However, I do agree with you about enjoying the moments and getting down on the floor and exploring the world from their eyes.

    I know this is a super long post, but I have one more thing to share :)

    Hillary Weeks told my friend that we should enjoy every minute with our children. Because even though they are sealed to us for eternity we won't have them as "kids" forever. I had never really thought about it. We get this special time to raise our children and enjoy the child in them. Once they are grown...their grown! I loved that. Made me want to put a brick on Kaleb's head though haha just so he won't grow anymore ;)

    Love and miss you Tiff! Good luck with baby 2. We will survive :-D


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